Do you notice when self-destructive thoughts enter your mind? Negative self-talk can become unhealthy and lead to self-sabotaging behavior if it is not recognized. Remember: thoughts become words and words become actions.
Here are some examples of negative self-talk and suggestions on how to turn your negative thoughts into positive ones:
1. I don’t have enough time to... (pursue my dreams, exercise, eat healthily, spend time with love ones etc.)
If the only things you have time to do are things you have to do, this mind-set can lead to an unfulfilled, unhappy life.
- Begin working to achieve a healthy balance in your life. Allow time each day to work on the things that bring happiness and fulfillment to your life. Make sure to fit your favorite activities into your schedule and work on your goals every day.
- If your day is busy, schedule at least 15 minutes for yourself.
- Proactively take control of your schedule, allowing you to complete every task that is important, but also making time for the other things that matter.
2. I don’t deserve to be happy
Past choices may have caused you a great deal of pain and unhappiness and you may have been beating yourself up emotionally over those decisions. However, mistakes are the best learning lessons in life and will make you a much stronger, knowledgeable person.
- Congratulate yourself for learning from your past mistakes. You have gained knowledge and growth and are able to move forward with a new awareness and understanding.
- Affirm “I deserve to be happy and I learn well from my mistakes”.
3. No one understands me
If you have this thought, examine “why” you may feel this way.
- Share your thoughts appropriately with the people in your circle and ensure that they understand how you feel. By sharing your feelings, you will gain confidence in your self-expression, which will help dissolve this negative thought.
4. Things never seem to work out for me
This is a general statement that states how you feel about yourself. This statement sends the subtle message “I must not be doing anything right.”
- In reality, you are most likely doing many things well. Focus on what you are doing right, rather than what is going wrong. Write down your strengths and accomplishments.
5. I am afraid to do the things I really want to do
Determine the exact cause of your fears. The source of your fears is likely to be embarrassment, failure, or concern about what others may think. It is healthy to have a certain amount of fear when trying something new or facing the unknown.
- Feel the fear and move forward. Otherwise, you will never grow and know the positive things that could happen when you follow your dreams, goals, and passions.
6. If I can’t do it perfectly, then I am not doing it at all
Thinking this way will prevent you from moving out of your comfort zone. It is positive to want to do your best, but how will you try anything new if it has to be done perfectly? Mistakes allow us to improve.
- Adopt this saying “If at first I don’t succeed, I will keep trying until I do.”
- Allow yourself the opportunity to make mistakes. Remind yourself that making mistakes is a learning experience you can benefit from. Embrace your mistakes, learn, grow, and try again.
When self-destructive thoughts permeate your mind, become aware of them and turn them into positive ones. You deserve to live the life that you desire and the first step is having a positive mind-set.
What do you think? Share your thoughts in the comments!